Lady: Is this my train?
Station Master: No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady: Don’t try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi.
Station Master: No Madam, I’m afraid it’s too heavy.
Yo mama so bald, when she puts on a turtle neck she looks like a roll on deodorant.
Half dressed redneck couple sitting on a couch watching the news on TV with man's arm around the woman.
The man says "Lookit them homo-sekshuls a ruining the sanctity of our institution.
"We oughta go to San Francisco just to show them liberals that marriage means one man, one woman. "
"Right, Darlin."
The woman replies, "That's right, Daddy."
Vote:
If I wanted a warm fuzzy feeling, I'd antialias my graphics!
Kennen was having a drink in a saloon when his neighbor, Stakely, came rushing in.
"Ah think somebody's stealin' yore pickup truck!" the man said breathlessly.
Kennan ran outside, but came back right away.
"Well, did yew stop him?" asked Stakely.
"Naw!" said the redneck.
"He was too fast.
But Ah got his license plate before he got away!"
Vote:
Q: What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat?
A: ‘Here Kitty, kitty, kitty’!
Two cannibals just got their hands on a corpse.
One says to the other, "I'll start at the head, you start at the feet."
They start to eat, and after awhile the one at the head yells to the other one, "Hey, how's it going?"
The other replies, "I'm having a ball!"
Getting mad, the one at the head yells, "Dammit, slow down, you're eating too fast!"
Vote:
Yo momma is so fat she made chocolate frogs go extinct.
Yo' Mama is so poor, she only goes to the grocery store for free samples.
Yo' Mama is so poor, she does a drive-by from the bus.