Knock Knock.
Who's there!
Ice cream!
Ice cream who?
Ice cream if you don't let me in!
Vote:
Q: What happens when four mexican guys are standing in quick sand?
A: Quatro Sinko.
"Yo momma so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!"
A foursome is waiting at the men's tee when another foursome of ladies are hitting from the ladies tee.
The ladies are taking their time and when finally the last one is ready to hit the ball she hacks it about 10 feet, goes over to it, hacks it another ten feet and looks up at the men waiting and says apologetically "I guess all those fucking lessons I took this winter didn't help."
One of the men immediately replies, "No, you see that's your problem. You should have been taking golf lessons instead."
How many men does it take to screw a light bulb?
A. One - men will screw anything.
B. One - men will screw up anything.
C. Five - one to actually do the screwing, four to listen to him brag about it.
Vote:
I dont understand why people say sex is good in the shower.
How do you guys not get your laptop wet?
Vote:
[ancient greece]
Teacher: "What have you all chosen for your thesis?"
Hippocrates: "I'm laying the ground work for centuries of modern medicine."
Socrates: "I am examining what it means to be."
Ptolemy: "Uh you guys ever uh notice how those stars look like a bear?"
Q: How do you get a nun pregnant?
A: Dress her up as an alter boy.
Q: What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
A: The location of the dirtbag.
Yo Momma is so ugly that she scares blind people!