Best jokes ever

Customer: "Waiter, there’s a fly swimming in my soup." Waiter: "So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?"
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Why did the tadpole feel lonely? Because he was newt to the area.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
Hipsters wear jackets in the summer, before it's cool.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: beauty, hipster
A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest, and writers cramp.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
There's no wine holder on this vacuum cleaner. It's like it wasn't even designed for women. How can I be expected to work under these conditions?
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: technology, wine, women, work
My life may be a mess but I know the difference between "Your" & "You're"-
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: insulting, life, stupid
Somebody stole my mood ring and I'm not quite sure how I feel about that..
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: life
As horses say to one another. Any friend of yours is a palomino!
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
Dentist (to the patient: "For God’s sake, stop making those noises and waving your arms. I haven’t even touched your tooth yet." Patient: "Yes, I know. But u’re standing on my foot."
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: doctor, god, life
Chuck Norris can see ultra-violet light.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
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