Dear Maths,
Please grow up now and solve you problems yourself.
Q: Why do nursing homes give Viagra to the old men every night?
A: It keeps them from rolling out of bed!
Vote:
On a military training exercise, the British divisional command radio operators were getting very bored one quiet night, when breaking the silence a voice asked over the air, "Are there any friendly bears listening?"
After a moment, another voice replied, "Yes, I'm a friendly bear," and then another voice, "I'm a friendly bear too!"
At this point, the Officer at Headquarters grabbed his microphone and let loose a blistering tirade at the operators for fooling around on an radio link. When he had finished, there
was silence for about ten seconds.
Then a small voice said, "You're not a very friendly bear, are you?"
When a white person delivers an asian baby.
White person: "Congratulations he looks like your husband... mom... cousin... uncle... neighbor..."
Vote:
The longer I stay at home, the more homeless I look.
Q: What do parsley and pubic hair have in common?
A: You push them both aside when you eat.
Vote:
Chuck Norris can headbutt himself in the face.
Vote:
Yo mama is so fat she has to write an apology letter to Japan.
What do you do when two snails have a fight?
Leave them to slug it out.
What's an octopuses favourite latin saying?
Squid pro quo.