What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater?
Claws.
Why did the indecisive chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side… er, no… to go shopping… no, not that either… damn it!
A blonde was driving down the road listening to the radio and was quite upset when she heard blonde joke after blonde joke.
A little way down the road, she saw another blonde out in a field rowing a boat.
The blonde stopped her car and angrily jumped out yelling, "You dumb blonde bimbo! It's blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name! If I could swim I'd come out there and give you what's coming to you!"
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!
Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?
A: Artificial intelligence.
Q: How many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet?
A: You can't touch that toilet, it's art.
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Q: Why do hipsters love ice?
A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
Q: Why is the longest human nose on record only 11 inches Long?
A: Because if it will 12 inches then it will a foot.
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Republicans only seem to care about people's health when they haven't been born yet!
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"I spent the whole evening knotsurfing!"
"Don't you mean netsurfing?"
"No, everyone was complaining because I tied the computer up for ages!"
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