Q: Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused a Novocain injection during root canal treatment?
A: He wanted to transcend dental medication!
Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares.
Actually he can also blow your face.
Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?
A: After a dye job.
Q:Where do you find a dog with no legs?
A:Right where you left him.
Chuck Norris can milk birds.
Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure began when Chuck Norris arrived from the future and roundhouse kicked that phone booth into the past.
Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
You mamas so small she fell of her chair and committed suicide.
When Chuck Norris runs backwards during a fight, it may seem like he's retreating.
He's not. He's just attacking from another direction.
Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.