Yo mamma so stupid she brought a spoon to a super bowl and the fat one brought a bowl.
Q. Why did Mrs. Smokey the Bear divorce Smokey the Bear? A. Because every time she got hot, he d beat her with a shovel!
Your mother is so fat, that when she jumped for joy, she got stuck!
There are only two kinds of computer. The latest model, and the obsolete.
‘A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.’ Bob Hope
Q: What do parsley and pubic hair have in common? A: You push them both aside when you eat.
What are two things a black man can't get in a fist fight. A black eye, and a swollen lip.
What's the best thing about a Siamese twin baby? Threesomes.
-How is Ruth? -Not sure. I broke up with her last month. -Oh no. You're so Ruthless. -And how long have you been waiting to use that? -I'd rather not say.
A hubby is having a short conversation with his wife. See dear, if you got home early from work one day and you found me pounding on another woman, this would be called an awkward situation! So its the same honey, if you came home early from work and found me in bed with another man? No darling, you are now confused and mixing the awkward situation with proper beating!