Q: How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It's too dark to count.
When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat. His body cries.
First cannibal: "Come and have dinner in our but tonight." Second cannibal: "What are you having?" First cannibal: "Hard-boiled legs."
What's the warmest organ in a dead woman's body? My dick.
If men got pregnant.... abortion would be available in convenience stores and drive-through windows.
What happened to the lizard in the wizard's garden pond? He had him newt-ered.
Q:What did the polar bear say when they saw tourists in sleeping bags? A:Mmmm, sandwiches!
What purrs along the road and leaves holes in the lawn? A Moles Royce.
Q: What is a sheep's favorite sport? A: Baaasket baaall!
Q: Where do blondes go to meet their relatives? A: The vegetable garden.