Why did the referee have such a high phone bill? Because he made to many calls!
Chuck Norris jumped off a building once. The ground didn't make it.
Chuck Norris can make sounds come out on his Air Guitar.
Yo' Mama is so poor, when she goes to the park, the pigeons throw her bread.
Chuck Norris CAN get blood from a stone.
An old woman goes to the doctor's office. The doctor gives her a checkup and says, "I need to do stool, blood and urine tests." The woman says, "Well can I just leave my underwear? Bingo starts in half an hour."
Yo Momma so fat she wears a vcr as a beeper.
Yo Mama so old... When she was at school...there was No history class!
Yo' Mama is so old, she calls her waterbed the Dead Sea.
Chuck Norris can do push-ups in a sit-up position.