Best jokes ever

Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't either.
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More jokes about: sex
Theres this girl,she is five. She goes spying on her big sister and she hears her cussing out her boyfriend and she says,"you mother fucking asshole!" Just then jill, thats the little girl,interrupts them talking and blurts out, "Big Sis,what does asshole mean? The girl surprised by the question,says BOYFRIEND! Okay , so the girl runs off onto the bathroom. Jill sneaks up on her dad while he was shaving and says boo! THE dad says "Shit!" So the girl ask her dad "What does shit mean?" And he stammers "Shaving cream". So she said okay and went about her day. Jill then runs into her mom, who was in the kitchen cutting the turkey. Her mom is startled when Jill comes in, cuts her hand, and says "Fuck!". So Jill ask "What does fuck mean momma?" And scramblimg for an answer, her mom says "cutting." All of the sudden, they hear the door. Jill answers and sees her Dads boss at the door. He ask "Sweetie, do you know where you everyone is at?" And she says, "Well, my sister’s talking to her asshole, my Moms fucking the turkey and my Dads wiping the shit off his face."
Vote: has 57.44 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he was stuck in the chicken.
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More jokes about: sex
What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"
Vote: has 57.40 % from 178 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, drunk
Q. What do you call 300 white men chasing a black man? A. The PGA tour
Vote: has 57.40 % from 145 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, golf, sport, white people
Yo mama so poor when i went to her house and picked up a paper plate she yelled "Not my good china!"
Vote: has 57.40 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, insulting, money, Yo mama
A cop is staking out a bar for drunk drivers. At closing time, he sees a guy stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and fumble for his keys for five minutes. When he finally gets in, it takes him another five minutes to get the key in the ignition. Meanwhile, everybody else leaves the bar and drives off. When he finally pulls away, the cop is waiting for him, pulls him over, and gives him a Breathalyzer test. The test shows he has a blood alcohol level of 0.0. The cop says, "How is this possible?" The guy says,"Tonight I'm the designated decoy."
Vote: has 57.40 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, cop
How many men does it take to pop popcorn? Three. One to hold the pan and two others to act macho and shake the stove.
Vote: has 57.36 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, men
Q: What do you get when you cross donkey DNA with an onion? A: A piece of ass that will bring tears to your eyes.
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More jokes about: animal, food
A man calls a lawyer’s office. A voice answers, ‘Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz and Schwartz.’ The man says, ‘Let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘I’m sorry, he’s on vacation.’ ‘Then let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘He’s on a big case, not available for a week.’ ‘Then let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘He’s playing golf today.’ ‘Okay, then, let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘Speaking.’
Vote: has 57.36 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: lawyer