Best jokes ever

Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Why don't blondes like to breastfeed their babies? It hurts to boil their nipples!
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A man knocked on a door an a women answered and he asked if he could use her toilet. She said you have 3 chances, if you do 3 things wrong I`ll call the police. So he went to piss but on the flush chain there was a bra so he ripped it off. Then when he was walking down the stairs he saw her cat called Boobs on the step & he hates cats so he squezed it & then threw it up the stairs. He then went in the kitchen where the women was & the women said why did you throw my cat up the stairs? He said I don`t know. While she went to get it, on the table was a glass of milk which he then drank. When the women came back she said you had your 3 chances now I'm calling the Police. When the police came they asked her what the man had done. She said this man has ripped her bra off, squezed her Boobs and drank her milk.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: women
Yo mama so ugly when she went outside it was a black out.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: ugly, vulgar, Yo mama
A black hole is where Chuck Norris ripped the universe a new one.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Yo mama so ugly, even goldfish don't smile back.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: fish, ugly, Yo mama
Ten years without brushing causes horrible tooth decade.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: dentist, health, time
I just love to do special things for my wife on Valentine's day. Like open the door for her when she puts all the laundry in the washing machine, or plug and unplug the vacuum as she moves from room to room cleaning. Guys, it's these little thoughtful things you can do to have a marriage such as mine.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: love, marriage, technology, Valentines day, wife
A man was beaten up by robbers on the road. He lay on the side of the road, half dead. A humanist came along, saw him and passed by on the other side. A Samaritan came by and also crossed to the other side. Finally, a modern Christian came along, looked at the man and said: "Whoever did this to you needs help."
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: christian, stupid
The Earth was flat until Chuck Norris looked in it's direction...then it rolled up into a ball.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
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