Chuch Norris doesn't make threats, he makes promises.
Chuck Norris can pick "side" when flipping a coin.
Show me a man with a nub for an index finger, and I'll show you a man that asked Chuck Norris to "Pull my Finger"
Chuck Norris uses battery acid for eye drops.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris invented his own type of karate. It's called Chuck-Will-Kill.
Chuck Norris is so powerful he can jumpstart a car by attaching the cables to his chest hair.
Why does Chuck Norris have a beard? A better question is what will he do to you if you ask him?
Chuck Norris knows how to kill you in more ways than you know how to die.
Thomas Edson made a shadow on a paper that Chuck Norris was reading, then Thomas Edson decided to create the electric light.
Out of 500 fights Chuck Norris has won 600.