Chuch Norris doesn't make threats, he makes promises.
Chuck Norris once had a heart attack; his heart lost.
Chuck Norris has won tennis match against a wall.
World War II started because Burger King screwed up Chuck Norris' order. Today Burger King NEVER gives you onions unless you ask for them.
When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold. Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.
Chuck Norris's computer has no "backspace" button, Chuck Norris doesn't make mistakes.
Chuck Norris had to write a story on bravery he got a A+ for writting his name.
Every morning Chuck Norris eats a bowl of nails for Breakfast... without milk.
Chuck Norris runs until the Treadmill gets tired.
Chuck Norris walks up his staircase to get to the basement.