In a fight between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris would win.
No questions.
Vote:
Q: What kind of money do elves use?
A: Jingle bills!
In a monastery senior sister announces to other sisters:
I have a good and a bad news for you.
The good one is that they have broughts to use a lot of carrots.
All the sisters start whistling happily.
But one of them asks:
What are the bad news?
Carrots came grated.
Vote:
Teacher: "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
Ramu: "The moon".
Teacher: "Why?"
Ramu: "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the
day time when we don't need it".
There is nothing wrong with sex on TV – as long as you don’t fall off.
Whats the similarity between getting a bl*wjob from an 80 year old and walking the tightrope ?
In both cases you really dont want to look down !
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus.
The therapist asked my wife why she wanted to end our marriage.
She said she hated all the constant Star Wars puns.
I look at the therapist and said, "Divorce is strong with this one!"
Vote:
Why pay $5 at Subway when you can get this footlong for free?
Q: What's the best way to talk to a velociraptor?
A: Long distance!
Vote: