Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris doesn't Tivo television programs. They come on when HE wants them to.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in the way that they are looking forward to it.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
Yo mama is so fat she has to write an apology letter to Japan.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
Dad shouts ..."STOP WATCHIN P*RN....I CAN HEAR IT IN MY ROOM!" Son: Dad...I am NOT watching p*rn... That is Maria Sharapova playing Tennis!
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, sport
Q: Why do blondes always die before help arrives? A: They always forget the "11" in "9-1-1".
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, phone, stupid
Yo mamma's so stupid she got trapped in a bathroom and wet her pants!
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama
Ones the bus was full of people. A man looks at a lovely girl, she looks at him, he smiled, she did so, he told her get off at the next station, she did, he took her place.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
Q:Why do ducks have webbed feet? A:To stamp out fires. Q:Why do elephants have flat feet? A:To stamp out burning ducks
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Q: Why did the bodybuilder cross the road? A: He didn't. There's no walking on leg day.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fitness, sport
Q: Whats the height of desperation? A: A vampire sucking blood from a sanitary napkin.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting