Best jokes ever

There appeared suddenly a crowd of many people in the street, because they caught a thief, who has stolen 500 euros from the grocery. They wanted to beat him up, but Johny stayed still and told the people: "who is without guilt, may throw a stone at this thief!" Nobody wanted to throw a stone at this thief, becuase nobody was without guilt. Suddenly one stone has hit this thief directly into his forehead and he has fallen down to the ground. Johny asked: "who was it? Who was it?" The Heaven has opened and the oldest archangel has s aid: "it was me!"
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: heaven, life, mean, money
How do you make a woman scream twice in the bedroom? Fuck her in the ass then wipe your dick on the curtains.
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, sex, women
Once visiting Arizona, Chuck Norris spat on the ground. The place is now known as the meteor crater.
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, geography
Your mom is so stupid she thought Nickelback was a refund.
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: insulting, money, music, stupid, Yo mama
Chuck Norris can skip a sound track on the radio if he doesn't like it.
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, music
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once ate a bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris never uses a navigation system. The direction he is heading is ALWAYS the right direction.
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
A blond a, a brunette and a redhead were at the top of a cliff looking down at the beach. Suddenly a genie appears to them and says "I will grant you each one wish if you'll jump off the side of this cliff." So the redhead jumps off and shouts "Seagull" and turns into a seagull and flies away. Then the brunette jumps off and shouts "Whale" and turns into a whale, falls into the sea and swims away. Finally the blond runs towards the cliff edge, but trips at the last second, as as she falls she shouts out "Shit"
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, genie, ginger
As a member of the organization that installs computer systems aboard Navy ships, I am mindful of how important the off-ship e-mail capabilities are to sailor morale, especially when some vessels are deployed for up to six months. One day while shopping at the base commissary, I noticed another crucial aspect of my job. I was behind a frazzled mother with two active children, and as I watched, she stalked over to where her young son had perched himself on the rail of the freezer case. "If you don't get off there right now," she commanded, "I'm going to e-mail your father!"
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has 51.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: computer, kids, navy, technology, time
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