Yo momma’s so fat, her driver’s license says, ‘Picture continued on other side’.
What do blondes put behind their ears to attract men? Their knees.
It’s not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn’t have the balls to do it.
Q: What do you call a woman with no a**hole? A: Divorced.
Chuck Norris' blood is the only blood to test positive for kickass.
Customer: Give me a hot dog. Waiter: With pleasure. Customer: No, with mustard.
Q: What is a bee that cant make up his mind? A: A maybe.
Man: When I bend my arm like this it hurts? Doctor: Well, stop doing it!
Q: What did the sergeant tomato say to the slacker soldier tomato? A: "You better catch up!"