Chuck Norris once created a time machine and had to fight himself. We call it The Big Bang.
Chuck Norris will chuck you in the norris!
Chuck Norris’ PC doesn’t have a Recycle bin – because when Chuck Norris deletes something, there’s no chance of it coming back.
Chuck Norris is who killed Kenny.
According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
Chuck Norris can't be in a 3D movie because the entire room would feel his roundhouse kicks.
The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.
Chuck norris farted in a ditch and the grand canyon was created.
Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
Chuck Norris can make his own reflection vomit with fear.
When Chuck Norris goes through airport security he makes them take their shoes off.