Yo Momma's a brick, she is flat on both sides and gets laid by Mexicans.
Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.
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Chuck Norris once made a crippled man run away.
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Chuck Norris can eat the inside of an orange without peeling it.
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Is it still rape if you yell 'Surprise!' first?
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A woman walks into a supermarket and buys:
1 bar of soap
1 toothbrush
1 tube of toothpaste
1 loaf of bread
1 pint of milk
1 single serving of cereal
1 single serving frozen dinner
1 can of Soup For One
1 16oz can of Miller Lite
The guy at the checkout looks at her and says, "Single, are you?"
The woman smiles sweetly and replies, "How did you guess?"
He replies, “Because you’re ugly.”
All men are born equal.
Chuck Norris was just born more equal than everyone else.
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Knock knock.
Who's there?
Cash.
Cash who?
Yes! I've always known you were a bit nutty!
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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks, physics decides to shut up.
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Chuck doesn't have e-mail, he has HE-mail.
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