A blonde is walking down the street and a car pulled up next to her. The man in the car says to her, "What do you have in the bag?" The blonde replies: "I have chickens!" The man thinks for a moment and says, "If I can guess how many chickens you have in the bag, can I have one?" The blonde thinks that it sounds fair and replies, "Okay, but I'll make the bet even better! If you can guess how many chickens I have in the bag I will give you BOTH of them!"
A lawyer is paid £950 in new bills but, on counting the money, he discovers that two notes have stuck together and he’s been overpaid by £50. This leaves him with an ethical dilemma – should he tell his partner?
Your mama so fat she climbed up hill and fell back down.
The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
Chick Norris has never pooped because nothing scares the shot out of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the only one who has a silver goldfish.
How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change it, and two to complain about how bad GE's customer support is.
Chuck Norris caught all the 493 Pokemon... With the Yellow version.
"Have you heard about the object-oriented way to become wealthy?" "No..." "Inheritance."
Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.