Chuck Norris can create tornados by running around in circles.
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A rather obese man is very excited about his new job and wants to start work immediately.
However, when he sits down at his computer, the only program installed was spreadsheets.
Confused, the man calls over his boss and asks:"Why there is only excel installed on this computer?"
His boss replies, "It was the only program in your size!"
Superman got his powers when Chuck Norris sneezed on him.
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Q: What do you call the sweat on your balls after having sex with your cousin?
A: Relative humidity.
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Karma believes in Chuck Norris.
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Whenever Chuck Norris rolls a 6 sided dice, he always rolls a 7.
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Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
Chuck Norris could catch that damn acorn in those ICE AGE movies!
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4-year-old: Why are you my dad?
Me: Because I made you.
4: How?
Me: ...
4: O.o
Me: ...
4: O.O
Me: With Legos.
If you click on start, run, then type in Chuck Norris you will get a permanent blue screen of death.
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