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If I wanted to hear from an a**hole I would fart.
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Q: Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist's window? A: Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.
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The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
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Chick Norris has never pooped because nothing scares the shot out of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris caught all the 493 Pokemon... With the Yellow version.
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Q: What do you get if you cross a football team with a flower center? A: Nottingham forest.
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Yo mama so fat she stepped on a weight machine and someone said "hey that's my phone number"!
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Is Snoop serious? Or is Snoop Lion?
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Did you hear about the cannibals who captured a scrawny old hunter? It sure gave them something to chew over.
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There was an old married couple who love each other very much. But each morning as he was waking up the husband let out a huge nasty wet fart with his wife right in the bed next to him. The wife always says "One day you're going to fart your guts out if you don't stop." Then one day the wife snapped she won't take it anymore and she got up extra early when downstairs and got the guts out of a turkey and put it in the bed behind. She went back downstairs to wait and then she heard the loud disgusting fart all the way down the stairs and then she hears nothing for a long while. Just as she's about to go upstairs and check on her husband he comes stomping down the steps and he says "Honey you were right after I get my guts out but with the grace of God and these two fingers I managed to shove them back up there again."
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