What do you get if you cross an eel with a shopper?
A slippery customer.
Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude?
He always said "Neigh"
Some people have alter egos.
Chuck Norris has no such thing.
Vote:
Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
Vote:
Chuck Norris is the real man inside of Chucky.
Vote:
You don't leave a room, Chuck Norris throws you out.
Vote:
Q: Where do blondes go to meet their relatives?
A: The vegetable garden.
You are so old, when you were a kid rainbows were black and white.
A neutron walks into the hotel bar and asks "how much for a beer?"
The bartender says, "for you? no charge."
Wilfred had just learned his abc's and was very scared of doing them in front of the class.
The teacher, though, told him that the best way to conquer his fears would be to just go ahead and do it.
So, trembling, he stood in front of the class and began.
"ABCDEFGHIJLKMNOQRSTUVWXYZ."
"Very good, Wilfred. But you forgot the P. Where's the P?
"It's running down my leg."