The chicken and the egg are laying in bed.
The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face while the egg is frowning and looking slightly annoyed.
The egg mutters "Well I guess that answers that riddle".
Yo momma so fat when she Bungie jumps she goes straight to hell.
What happened when the chef got his hand caught in the dishwasher?
They both got fired.
Q: What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?
A: Doyouthinkysaraus.
Vote:
Q: How do you make a dead baby float?
A: One scoop of ice cream and Two scoops of dead baby.
Vote:
Yo mommas so black that when she walked outside the street lights turned on.
Vote:
Q: Now why is it, officer, IF YOU TRUST YOUR FELLOW OFFICERS WITH YOUR LIFE, that you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with those officers?
A: You see sir, we share the building with a court complex, and sometimes defense attorneys have been known to walk through that room...
A female police officer arrests a guy for drunk driving.
While reading him his Miranda Rights, the female officer tells the man:
"Sir, you have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say, can and will be held against you."
"Boobs" the drunk replied.
You are driving in a car at a constant speed.
On your left side is a valley and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you.
In front of you is a galloping pig which is the same size as your car and you cannot overtake it.
Behind you is a helicopter flying at ground level.
Both the giant pig and the helicopter are also traveling at the same speed as you.
What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?
Don't ride the kiddie merrygo round when you are drunk, so get off.
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.