Why do polo bears like bald men? Because they have a great, white, bear place.
Chuck Norris won more Olympic medals than the hole world... Including himself.
What's yellow, comes from Peru, and is completely unknown? Waterloo Bear, Paddington Bear's forgotten cousin.
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you? Your calves.
Q: What did the emu say to the nurse? A: Mend her bones or walk the plank
Why was the lion-tamer fined? He parked on a yellow lion.
When Chuck Norris plays sudoku, he can put two same numbers in one square and still solve it right.
The US government is throwing away millions of unused stamps with pictures of favorite lawyers on them. The people that use them don’t know which side to spit on!
Never tell Chuck Norris he lost the game because he will make you lose the game then roundhouse kick you in the face making you lose twice.
Chuck Norris can run so fast he can cause time travel.