Teacher: “How can you prove the earth is round?”
Boy: “I can’t. Besides, I never said it was.”
When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people.
He walks through them
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Q: A blonde is walking down the street with a pig under her arm.
She passes a person who asks "Where did you get that?"
A: The pig says, "I won her in a raffle!"
One day Stan comes home from a hard day at work.
He sees his wife bending down to clean the floor under the sofa.
So Stan goes over to his wife and starts fucking her from behind.
After he finishes, he gives her a hard smack to the head.
His wife yells, ''What was that for!?''
To which Stan replies, ''That's for not checking to see who it was.''
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'till."
After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
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Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it.
Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground.
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What's a man's idea of honesty in a relationship?
Telling you his real name.
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Yo mama's so skinny, she used a needle for a baseball bat.
The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
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Chuck Norris beat a brick wall at tennis.
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