Chuck Norris made a mistake once and it corrected itself.
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Q: What is worse than waking up the morning after an orgy with pubic hair in your teeth?
A: Waking up with a lump in your throat and a string hanging out of your mouth.
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Postcard from a blonde:
Having a wonderful time.
Where am I?
How do you know when a blonde has a brain fart?
Her ears flap.
When Chuck Norris decides he wants to kill some time... it's not a figure of speech.
He actually does it.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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Q: How do you eat a frog?
A: You put one leg behind each ear.
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What's the difference between a leprechaun and gonorrhea?
One's a cunning runt.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why there's only one airbender left.
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Q: What do u call a police officer that works in bed?
A: A undercover cop.