You're so ugly, Yo' Mama had to be drunk to breastfeed you.
One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner". And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"
Chuck Norris once won a chess game after losing his king
What is the difference between a black monopoly board and a white one. The black on you roll any number and you go to jail.
I like black people . . . . . I used to have some black friends 'till my dad sold them!
The chicken and the egg are laying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face while the egg is frowning and looking slightly annoyed. The egg mutters "Well I guess that answers that riddle".
If looks could kill they would be called Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can play Bach's 9th Symphony with a triangle.
Chuck Norris can do push-ups with his beard.
We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.