When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
If Chuck Norris replaced Roy Scheider, the movie would have been known as Broken Jaws, and would have only lasted 12 minutes.
Chuck Norris made Stevie Wonder flinch.
Yo momma is so old that her titties sag all the way to hell!
Chuck Norris will be the star lead in the remake of the movie "300" it will now be called "1"
Yo mama so fat she made her own landslide.
If Chuck Norris jumped off the Empire State Building, your mom would tell you to do it too.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris puts phone companies on hold.
Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson