How can you tell when a skunk is angry? It raises a stink.
How can you tell a rabbit from a skunk? A skunk uses a cheaper deodorant.
My wife asked if I would give it to her "doggy style." So I took a dump on the floor and chewed up her shoes.
Q: Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? A: Becuase the "P" is silent.
If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
Three holy men rode a plane home. There was a terrorist on board who of the firm belief that the world should end. Who should talk him out of it. The pilot and his crew gave up and believed the holy men should live. In the remains was a burnt soccer ball labeled flame retardant. And a melted black box. The holy men still live to tell the tale. And so does the football.
What do you get if you cross a skunk and a cartoon penguin? Pingu-Pong.
Chuck Norris can listen to 24 hours worth of music and not move a single muscle.
When should you feel sorry for a skunk? When its spray pump is out of order!.
Did you hear about the skunk who sat on a fan? He got cut off without a scent.