There are no bombs, Chuck Norris just jumps out of a helicopter and punches the ground.
God said let there be light. Chuck Norris said say please.
Chuck Norris can eat the inside of an orange without peeling it.
Chuck Norris once made a crippled man run away.
Superman got his powers when Chuck Norris sneezed on him.
Chuck Norris can take the bridge to nowhere and actually reach his destination.
Chuck Norris can watch music.
There is no such thing as an endangered species, they are Chuck's likes and dislikes.
Girl: Babe I just gotta a tattoo of a sea shell on my thigh can you hear the ocean? *Pulls his head to her thigh* Guy: Nope, But I sure can smell the fish.
Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with fourteen times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer. This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.