No matter how fast you run, Chuck Norris will always walk faster.
Chuck Norris had never escape from jail. Jail escapes from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is danger's middle name.
The Total Gym uses Chuck Norris to stay in shape.
The sandman puts other people to sleep but Chuck Norris put the sandman to sleep.
Scientists have developed a way to travel through time, by being on the recieving end of a roundhouse kick by Chuck Norris.
People say that time heals all wounds. They obviously never got roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.
Chuck Norris didn't grow a beard, a beard grew Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does. NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
If Chuck Norris punches you in your dream you will wake up with bruises.