Chuck Norris Watches "the Nat.Geo. Specials" on Discovery Channel.
What must a policeman have before searching a rabbits home? A search warren.
Why did the moron give the sleepy cow a hammer? He wanted her to hit the hay!
What do cows call Frank Sinatra? Old Moo Eyes.
What do reindeer say before telling you a joke? This one will sleigh you.
Why is a reindeer like a gossip? Because they are both tail bearers.
Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle? It wants to keep it's Stockholm!
What's a rabbits favorite TV show? Hoppy Days.
A man hires a taxi to take him to court for his bankruptcy trial. When they arrive he says to the driver, ‘Well, I suppose you might as well come in too.’
One night a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible DUI violations. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. The man sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Meanwhile, all the other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started his engine and began to pull away. The police officer was waiting for him. As soon as he pulled onto the street, the officer stopped him, read him his rights and administered the breathalyzer test to determine his blood-alcohol content. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."