Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris can play a whole note in 3/4 time.
Vote:
has 50.22 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, music, time
Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.
Vote:
has 50.22 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
Vote:
has 50.22 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, military
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
Vote:
has 50.22 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
One day a mom was cleaning junior's room and in the closet she found a bondage S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She hid the magazine until his father got home and showed it to him. He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word. She finally asked him, "Well what should we do about this?" Dad looked at her and said, "Well I don't think you should spank him."
Vote:
has 50.22 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: kids
After a number of attempts to get the customer service agent on the phone to understand his name, my Asian American friend Appappa decided to spell it out. "A for apple," he began. "P for pineapple, p for pineapple, a for apple, p for pineapple, p for—" The flustered agent interrupted. "I have a better idea," she said. "Just tell me how many apples and how many pineapples."
Vote:
has 50.20 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: asian, communication, customer service, phone, stupid
Yo momma’s so fat, she has to use a lawn chair instead of a Thigh Master.
Vote:
has 50.18 % from 170 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
During vacation my front door's open and I left a note saying "This house is protected by Chuck Norris 3 days a week you guess which 3." All was good.
Vote:
has 50.17 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Which is the most confusing day in America? Father's day! 80% don't know whom to wish. Rest 20% are scared someone will come and wish them.
Vote:
has 50.17 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: ethnic, Fathers day, kids, sex
Q: Why do they say elephants never forget? A: They haven't met Alberto Gonzalez.
Vote:
has 50.16 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: elephant, memory, political, republican
<<<924925926927
More jokes →
Page 924 of 1431.