Best jokes ever

Q: Why did the married man sell his complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica? A: He didn't need them any longer his damn wife knows everything.
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: marriage, wife
When Chuck Norris wants salmon he eats the bear too.
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Why did God give women legs? So they don't leave a trail like a slug.
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
A brain walks into a bar and says, "Ill have a pint of beer please. "The barman looks at him and says "Sorry, I cant serve you." "Why not?" askes the brain. "Youre already out of your head."
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, beer
The Dead Sea was formerly known as The Living Sea. Until it met Chuck Norris.
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are wandering through the desert, hungry and hallucinating, when they come upon a rotting, dead camel. "Well," said the Englishman, "I support the Liverpool football club, so I'll eat the liver." "I support the Hearts club," said the Scotsman, "so I'll eat the heart." "I support Arsenal," said the Irishman, "but I seem to have lost my appetite."
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, football
A boy with a physical disability has just returned from a summer camp. His mum with an astonished face notices a diploma dancing for 1st place at the bottom of the boy's luggage. Mum: "Jimmy, did you dance with a girl?" Boy: "Nouuu." Mum: "Did you dance with a boy then?" Boy: "No, mum." Mum: "So how did you get it?" Boy: "I went to take some tea."
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: health, stupid
Chuck Norris can switch his motorcycle to four-wheel drive.
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
2012 is the predicted date for the end of the world. The only rational explanation is Chuck Norris.
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time
What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk? A milk dud.
Vote:
has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
<<<978979980981
More jokes →
Page 978 of 1427.