Some say that Chuck Norris is the Stig.
Vote:
What's the important part of a horse?
The manr part.
You're not alone.
Sometimes, even Usain Bolt feels like he's running in circles.
Yo mama is so ugly she made the ugliest person in the world cry.
Q: Did you hear about the annoying midget who went to a nudist colony?
A: He kept getting in everyone's hair.
Vote:
Wonder Woman's magic Lasso is actually one of Chuck Norris' chest hairs.
Vote:
Why do Mexicans cross the border in pairs?
Because it says "No Tres-Passing"
A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about.
He asks his father for advice.
The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy."
The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain.
Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy's nervousness builds.
He remembers his father's advice, and chooses the first topic.
He asks the girl: "Do you like spinach?" She says "No," and the silence returns.
After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father's suggestion and turns to the second item on the list.
He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again.
The boy then plays his last card.
He thinks of his father's advice and asks the girl the following question: "If you had a brother, would he like spinach?"
What do you call 35,000 men with their hands up?
"Iraqi Army."
Me - Can you go to your moms room?
Friend - Yeah, why?
Me - I left my pants in there.
Friend - Fuck you!