There's two fish in a tank, and one says ''How do you drive this thing?''
Chuck Norris could stab you with a worm.
Vote:
How is a rabbit like a plum?
They re both purple, except for the rabbit.
When is a lion not a lion?
When he turns into his cage.
According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.
Vote:
Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle?
It wants to keep it's Stockholm!
Q: What do women and cats have in common?
A: Pussy farts.
I had a knock at my door earlier, it was a policeman…
“Mr Cook?”
“Yes,” I replied.
“I’m afraid your dog has just been reported to have chased someone on a bike.”
I said, “That’s bullshit – my dog doesn’t have a bike!”
What do cows wear when they are on vacation in Hawaii?
Moo moos.
What must a policeman have before searching a rabbits home?
A search warren.