Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
What’s the difference between a pigeon and a nigger? The pigeon is white and the nigger can’t fly!
It was a hot summer night. Slowly I spread her legs and my hand was trying to find its way to her nipple... I was so excited! I never milked a cow before...
A fellow always wanted to own a pet skunk, so in the dead of winter, he took his girlfriend with him to go hunting for one. After a bit of waiting, they bagged a skunk and brought him back to the truck. The skunk was very scared and very cold, so the guy asks his girlfriend if she can keep the skunk between her legs to keep him warm. "But what about the smell?" asks his girlfriend. "Oh, he'll get used to it, just like I did."
A crocodile has 2 eyes and 80 teeth. Question: What has 80 eyes and 2 teeth? Answer: A full bus of old men.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A.A dog is always happy to see you B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.
Question: What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a pit bull? Answer: Lipstick.
So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says ''Your eyes sparkle like diamonds''. I said, ''Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck'
A guy walks into a bar with a giraffe, and the giraffe gets waay too drunk. The bartender says, "Hey! you can't leave that lyin' there!" The guy goes, "that's not a lion its a giraffe!"
Q: Why does a dog lick himself? A: He can't make a fist.