Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.
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Q: What is the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
A: One says "See you later" and the other says "In a while".
Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper, had recently died.
"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad.
Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."
Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"
The male worm towards the female worm:
Baby, if you don’t take me as you’re husband, I’m throwing myself to the chickens!
Q: What's meaner than a pit bull with herpes?
A: The guy who gave it to him.
Vote:
Yo mamma so fat and scary, Godzilla watches "yo mamma" movies!
What is the definition of "moon"?
The past tense of "moo"!
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
What is a moo hoo for a cow fight?
A cattle battle.