A stallion and a mare where due to get married, but the stallion didn't show up at the church. He got colt feet.
Why was the racehorse names Strawberry Ice? He was a sherbet!
What is the slowest racehorse in the world? A clotheshorse.
Q: What goes "oom... oom"? A: A cow walking backward!
Q: What do you call a frog who wants to be a cowboy? A: Hoppalong Cassidy.
Q: Why couldn't the pony sing? A: Because he's a little hoarse.
Chuck Norris doesn’t ride a horse, he uses his crotch to carry it.
A blonde and her husband were driving home, when they hit a rabit. They both got out of the car and stood over the poor creature. The blonde and her husband just stood their, when she said "Oh I know." So she when in the car and rumaged through her purse and came out with what looked a bottle. She poured it on the rabit and they both got in the car. Suddenly the rabit got up hopped a little bit and waved, hopped a little and waved, hopped to the top of the hill and waved. Then dissapered over it. The husband just stared at his wife and said "Honey, what did you pour on that rabit?" His wife just said "Hair Restorer with a permanent wave."
A snail is walking down the road, when all of a sudden two turtles appear. They rough up the snail, take his money, and leave him for dead. Months later in the courtroom, after the two turtles have been arrested, the judge asks the snail to describe what happened on the night of the assault. The snail says, "Gee, I would love to, your honor, but it all happened so fast!"
Pet Owner: "Every time a bell rings, my dog goes and sits in the corner." Vet: "That's perfectly normal; he's a boxer."