While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting and old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,"Are there any gators around here?!" "Naw," the man hollered back, "they ain't been around for years!" "Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway there he asked the guy,"How'd you get rid of the gators?" "We didn't do nothin'," the beachcomber said. "The sharks got 'em."
Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man? A. "How do you breathe through something so small?"
In India, cows wait until Chuck Norris crosses the street.
When Chuck Norris gets angry, forests explode from their own boiling sap. When Chuck Norris laughs, flowers bloom and butterflies hatch.
Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
It's call a Chuck Steak because Chuck just kicked that cow's butt.
Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert? A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
Q: What's the difference between Chuck Norris and a bear? A: Chuck Norris has more chest hair.
Chuck Norris tangled with Wolverine. He beat to him to a bloody pulp, then dared him to heal himself. Wolverine will not be in the next X-Men movie.
When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.