The best animal jokes

Q: What do you get if you cross a parrot with a shark? A: A bird that will talk your ear off!
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has 50.64 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, communication, parrot
Patty was sitting in her back yard digging a hole to bury her dead goldfish. Mrs. Johnson, who lived next door, was watching her over the fence. Mrs. Johnson said, "Patty, what are you doing?" Patty said, "I'm digging a hole to bury my dead goldfish." Mrs. Johnson said, "Patty, don't you think that hole is a little BIG for a goldfish?" Patty said, "No...it's inside your damn cat!"
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has 50.45 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a bear while on a survival trek in Siberia. That incident was known as the Tunguska event.
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has 50.29 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, geography
Q: Where does a kangaroo go that can't hop? A: Hopspital.
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has 50.29 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, hospital
Little Johnny: „Mom, can I get a dog at Christmas, please?"  Mother: „No, you'll be getting turkey, like every year!"
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has 50.26 % from 101 votes. More jokes about: animal, Christmas, dog, food, little Johnny
What did the flower say to be the bee? "Buzz off you stupid ugly horny cunt."
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has 50.00 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, dirty, vulgar
What's red and green and goes at 100mph? A frog in a blender.
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has 50.00 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why couldn't the pony sing? A: Because he's a little hoarse.
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has 50.00 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: animal, music
How far can a rabbit run into the woods? Halfway. After that she's running out of the woods.
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has 49.97 % from 150 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk? A milk dud.
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has 49.93 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
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