What did the judge say when the skunk was on trial? Odour in court.
Scooby Doo prefers Norris snacks'.
Did you hear about the man with five keen senses? He still lacked common and horse!
How do you make a small fortune out of horses? Start off with a large fortune!
How far can a rabbit run into the woods? Halfway. After that she's running out of the woods.
Barking dog at the back door wanting in and your wife's yelling at the front wanting in. Which one do you let in? The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!
A scientist and a philosopher were being chased by a hungry lion. The scientist made some quick calculations, he said “it’s no good trying to outrun it, its catching up”. The philosopher kept a little ahead and replied “I am not trying to outrun the lion, I am trying to outrun you !”
Q: What animal rotates at least 200 times after it dies? A: A rotisserie chicken.
Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
What's a moo hoo for a bunch of weirdo cattle? A nerd herd.