A deer hunter just messed up another hunt.
This happened to him more times than he could count.
He would spot a buck, aim, fire and miss.
He would sneak up close just to get busted and watch the deer run away.
He would sneeze just as the buck came into range.
He would fall asleep on the stand, waking in time to watch a giant buck scamper away.
Frustrated, he complained to his hunting buddies.
"Everything that happens to guys that don't know how to hunt keeps happening to me!" he said.
What do you call a cow that fell in a hole?
A hole-y Cow.
Where did the mooron take the baby cow to eat?
To the calf-ateria.
What did the lions say to his cubs when he taught them to hunt?
Don't go over the road till you see the zebra crossing.
First Kangaroo: How do you tell the difference between an elephant and a rhinoceros?
Second Kangaroo: The elephant has a better memory.
Did you hear about the man with five keen senses?
He still lacked common and horse!
What dinosaur can't stay out in the rain?
Stegosaur-rust.
What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
It gets toad away.
What do you get if you cross a woodpecker with a carrier pigeon?
A bird who knocks before delivering its message !
A old snake goes to see his Doctor.
"Doc, I need something for my eyes...can't see well these days".
The Doc fixes him up with a pair of glasses and tells him to return in 2 weeks.
The snake comes back in 2 weeks and tells the doctor he's very depressed.
Doc says, "What's the problem...didn't the glasses help you?"
"The glasses are fine doc, I just discovered I've been living with a water hose the past 2 years!"