The best animal jokes

Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
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Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man? A. "How do you breathe through something so small?"
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What’s the difference between cats and dogs? Dogs have owners, cats have staff.
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A man came home from the bar with an unknown woman. He woke up in the morning and yelled, "A crocodile, a crocodile!" The woman woke up and asked, "Where, where?" A man cried again, "O-o-oh, the crocodile is talking!"
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Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God.
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Did you hear about the boy who was told to do 100 lines? He drew 100 cats on the paper. He thought the teacher had said lions.
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Why don't lobsters share? They re shellfish.
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Have you read the book, "100-mile Horse Trek" Who wrote it? Major Bumsore.
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How do you hire a horse? Put a brick under each hoof!
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What is the slowest racehorse in the world? A clotheshorse.
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