Chuck Norris protects his body guards.
Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
The only time Chuck Norris has ever faced a worthy opponent is when he looked at himself in the mirror.
The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
Chuck Norris didn't cross the road... he was already on the other side...
Gravity is Space's way of trying to keep Chuck Norris away from it.
Chuck Norris lives on The Road Not Taken.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a wristwatch. He always knows when it's time to kick some ass.
Chuck Norris can stare you to death while looking the other direction!
For Chuck Norris... In the game Monopoly every space is free parking.
An ancient Chinese prophecy states that a man will be created to protect the lands from all evil. Chuck Norris killed that man.