Chuck Norris protects his body guards.
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When Chuck Norris was in kindergarden he made his teacher spit out her gum.
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Chuck Norris can make a dog bark the alphabet, in spanish, backwards.
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Chuck Norris once had a weak moment, just to know what it felt like.
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Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.
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Chuck Norris cleans his teeth with a dentists drill.
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Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
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Chuck Norris can close Pandora's Box.
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Chuck Norris walked right into Area 51, bought a Snapple, and walked out.
No one dared to move.
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A watched kettle never boils... unless Chuck Norris is doing the watching, in which case it explodes.
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Chuck Norris can hit a grand slam with no one on base.
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