When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
Crop Circles are Chuck Norris's preschool art projects.
Chuck Norris doesn't beat around the bush, he beats up the bush.
Chuck Norris does not need deodorant because sweat instantly runs away.
Did u know Chuck Norris had a role in star wars. He was the force.
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: "What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."