Chuck Norris doesn't tell lies. He changes facts.
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Before going to bed, the Boogeyman always checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
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Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room.
The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
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Ckuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet...he scares the shit out of it.
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What every sports player should say after winning?
"First of all, I would like to thank Chuck Norris for not competing."
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Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
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A cop once pulled Chuck Norris over...Luckily, the cop left only with a warning.
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Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
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