Chuck Norris can sit at the corner of a round table
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
While learning CPR Chuck Norris actually brought the practice dummy to life.
When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
Chuck Norris broke the law once. It still isn’t fixed.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
Chuck Norris installed his own home security system. It's called "Chuck Norris."
If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."