Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience.
Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.
When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't tell lies. He changes facts.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
Chuck Norris can sit at the corner of a round table
What every sports player should say after winning?
"First of all, I would like to thank Chuck Norris for not competing."
When Chuck Norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up.
When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.