If you carefully examine your health insurance policy, you will see that there is no cover for "Chuck Norris related incidents".
Chuck Norris cut's a knife with butter.
Chuck Norris once entered a black hole just to see what was in it. Dissapointed, he then walked out.
When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can win an argument with his wife.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris was once shot. The bullet died.
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
When Chuck Norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up.