When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: "What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
Chuck Norris can count the number of corners in a circle.
Chuck Norris doesn't expect the unexpected. He knows the unexpected.
Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.
Chuck Norris once won the title of Iron Chef by cooking instant ramen noodles.
Chuck Norris broke a mirror and got 7 years of good luck.
Chuck Norris is so awesome, he can dodge rain.
There is only one award higher than the medal of Honor: The Chuck Norris Medal of Roundhouse. No mortal man has ever earned it.
Chuck Norris once created a time machine and had to fight himself. We call it The Big Bang.