Chuck Norris is a fact.
Gravity is Space's way of trying to keep Chuck Norris away from it.
Chuck Norris once gave a fire hydrant a ticket for being next to his parked car.
Chuck Norris once toboggoned down Mount Everest and then sprinted back up cuz he realized he lost his mitten.
Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
The boogie man checks his closet at night for Chuck Norris.
The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
Chuck Norris can eat food while his mouth is closed.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them