When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does. NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
If Chuck Norris fights with himself, it's a win-win situation.
Lightening is too slow to strike Chuck Norris.
On the show Man v.s Wild, when they talk about the profesionals that Bear recieves help from, they are refering to Chuck Norris.
The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Fedor Emelianenko because he takes Fedor to the vet regularly.
When Chuck Norris hired his bodyguards, he figured he was paying to save someone.
Chuck Norris is the only person that can deliver a roundhouse kick in full 1080p, remember that the next time you watch Walker Texas Ranger in Blu-Ray.
"Walker Texas Ranger: The Movie 3-D" was considered by Warner Brothers; however the technology to create the visual effects will never be possible.