The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris was the image used for Papa Smurf.
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Chuck Norris has an iPhone with whole apple.
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Chuck Norris walked his version of a 40-yard dash in 5.6 seconds; he was later told it was the Boston Marathon.
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Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact? A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
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In World War 2 Chuck Norris Pointed his Fingers at an enemy zero and said BANG, The plane burst into flames and crashed.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.
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Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
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You can lead a horse to water, but Chuck Norris can make it drink.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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