Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King and got one.
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Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it.
Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground.
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When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris jumps on hand grenades to shave his chest hair.
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Chuck Norris knows who let the dogs out.
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Chuck Norris went for a swim in the ocean.
The sharks headed for land.
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People say "bless you" when you sneeze because Chuck Norris might catch your soul.
It's a myth.
Chuck Norris can take your soul whenever he wants.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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Chuck Norris texts with punctuation.
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Chuck Norris doesn't run out of patience, patience runs out of him from fear of a roundhouse kick to the face.
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