Give Chuck Norris a piece of coal and he'll give you back a diamond.
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Chuck Norris is so powerful that when he goes fishing, the fish are so scared they drown.
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Chuck Norris protects his airbag in an accident.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.
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When Chuck Norris breaks a sweat... he tries to do it as quickly as possible so as not to hurt it.
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Some people break the laws of the state, Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
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When Chuck Norris watches a horror movie, Chuck Norris dosen't scream, the movie does.
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Everybody loves Raymond. Except for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris was in all the Star Wars movies, he played the force.
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In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris still kicks your ass.
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