Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
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Chuck Norris is the reason you turn a light on when you enter a room.
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Atlas doesn't drop the earth because he knows Chuck Norris lives in it.
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According to CNN, Chuck Norris was commanding the SEAL team in Afghanistan.
When Osama found that out, he shot himself in the head.
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Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes.
He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
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Chuck Norris made the Beatles cross Abbey Road.
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Chuck Norris can eat just one pringle.
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Chuck Norris once toboggoned down Mount Everest and then sprinted back up cuz he realized he lost his mitten.
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When Chuck Norris went to Easter island, he couldn't understand why other tourists kept asking him to pose for photos next to the stone monoliths.
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Chuck Norris cuts paper by sticking his fingers out in a V and moving them up and down.
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