Chuck Norris sends his beard clippings to the police.
They are used as bullet proof vests.
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Chuck Norris cannot be put in a corner.
The corner always backs away.
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Wherever you go, Chuck Norris will already be there.
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Chuck Norris jumped the grand canyon...longways
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Chuck Norris can unlock a hairpin with a door.
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Chuck Norris uses paper to cut scissors.
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Chuk Norris was only twice angry, and those times are known as WWI and WWII.
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Chuck Norris doesn't cry.
His eyes sweat.
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In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
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Chuck Norris has the right to keep and arm bears.
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