The best Chuck Norris jokes

Where was your mom last night? At Chuck Norris' place.
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T. S. Eliot measured out his life with coffee spoons. Chuck Norris uses a backhoe.
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Who would win in a fight between a bear and a lion? Answer - neither, Chuck Norris would beat them both with a single round-house-kick.
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In "ring around the rosie", Chuck Norris does not fall down.
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Chuck Norris doesent need a postage stamp...  He just tells the letter where to go and it gets there.
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Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.
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Chuck Norris doesn't smile, his mouth smiles for him.
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Chuck Norris paints little red wagons for a living with his victim's blood. But not the wheels. That's just wrong.
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Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
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People with Pogonophobia (fear of beards) do not fear Chuck Norris beard. They are too scared of his entire existance to focus on 1 part.
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