The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris doesn't have to face the consequences, the consequences have to face Chuck Norris.
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If you want to commit suicide, all you need to do is say,"Chuck Norris is a loser."
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Q: How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: None. Chuck Norris can see in the dark.
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Chuck Norris was the Best Man at his own wedding.
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Chuck Norris caught a bullet with the same gun he fired it from.
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Chuck Norris can milk birds.
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Chuck Norris once rolled a dice. It landed on tails.
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If Chuck Norris appears in your dream, don't panic, he is only looking for Freddy Krueger.
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The saying "Kill two birds with one stone" actually came from when chuck Norris downed two Peregrin Falcons with one roundhouse kick.
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Q: Why are there prairies? A: Because Chuck Norris scared the trees away.
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