If Chuck Norris was a villian in a video game, you'll never win. But if he was the hero, it's unplayable; because no one controls Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once shook a pirates hand. That pirate is now known as Captain Hook
Chuck Norris once separated his powers into five people, they are now called The Avengers.
Nice guys finish last because bad guys run faster from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris wrote the Assassins creed!
Chuck Norris is so hard, he uses diamonds as stress balls.
Chuck Norris once heard that nothing can kill him, so he tracked down nothing and killed it.
Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft.
Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg was recently hospitalize, because Chuck Norris poked him.
Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.