A Klondike bar would do anything for a Chuck Norris.
The burning bush that Moses spoke of was actually Chuck Norris's beard!
When Chuck Norris gets angry, forests explode from their own boiling sap. When Chuck Norris laughs, flowers bloom and butterflies hatch.
Charlie Sheen winning? Chuck Norris says "I think not."
Chuck Norris roundhouse kick is fast that he stopped the Flash.
Who would win in a fight between a bear and a lion? Answer - neither, Chuck Norris would beat them both with a single round-house-kick.
Don't type "Chuck Norris" on Monster Milktruck, your milk will turn into beer.
Chuck Norris once encountered the men in black and he still remembers it.
Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
The reason we are human is because Chuck roundhouse kicked a monkey into a higher species.