Chuck Norris doesn't wear seatbelts.
Seatbelts wear Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once won a three-legged race... By himself.
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay:
"What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
Chuck Norris was once bitten by a venomous cobra ....
After 5 days of excrutiating pain the cobra
Eventually died
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.
2 > 1... unless that 1 is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris favorite pick up line: ''now''
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Aliens do exist.
They're just waiting for Chuck Norris to die before they attack.
If Chuck Norris was a villian in a video game, you'll never win.
But if he was the hero, it's unplayable; because no one controls Chuck Norris.