When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.
Angelina Jolie can curve a bullet. Chuck Norris can curve a laser.
The world won't end in 2012, it will end when Chuck Norris gets bored of it.
Chuck Norris has only played Pacman twice, and beat the game both times. The ghosts were too afraid to leave their little box to try to stop him.
Chuck Norris's 1st Grade teacher asked him how many stars there were on the American Flag. Chuck Norris replied "Yes." and was correct.
Chuck Norris lit a match and ended the Cold War.
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
Chuck Norris can answer a missed call.
Chuck Norris doesn't fall, he merely tests the durability of the floor with his face.
There was no volcanic eruption in Iceland - Chuck Norris opened the BBQ season.