July 4th is Independence day.
And the day Chuck Norris was born.
Coincidence? I think not.
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Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us.
The only difference is, then he kills people.
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Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower.
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Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
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When someone is in trouble it's a job for Superman, when Superman is in trouble it's a job for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is the only person able beat a fish at holding his breath under water.
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Chuck Norris hit a home run in a football game.
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There is a plaque laid next to the remnants of the Titanic which reads, "Only Chuck Norris is unsinkable"
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Chuck Norris stopped playing golf after that unfortunate incident with the dinosaurs.
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Chuck Norris doesn't tie shoelaces, he wins them.
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