Chuck Norris stopped playing golf after that unfortunate incident with the dinosaurs.
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Chuck Norris doesn't tie shoelaces, he wins them.
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Chuck Norris can never fill out an online form, because Chuck Norris will never submit.
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Chuck Norris is what makes the Central Nervous System nervous
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When you google up Chuck Norris, he googles you back for revenge.
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Chuck Norris doesn't daydream.
He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
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Chuck Norris jokes are a oxymoron because Chuck Norris isn't a joke.
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Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
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Chuck Norris never actually moves.
He merely rotates the earth with his feet.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a Facebook, he has a Fistbook...
No one's his friend.
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